Gone Gone Gone

by Fred Gillen Jr

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04:27
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credits

released April 1, 2006

Produced by Fred Gillen Jr., recorded by Gillen at Woody's House, Croton -on- Hudson, NY

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about

Fred Gillen Jr Peekskill, New York

NYFA grant recipient Fred Gillen Jr has released nine full-length albums, and has toured all over the U.S. and Europe. His songs have been featured on ABC's "All My Children," NPR's "Car Talk," CMJ's Comp, and in 2012 his version of Woody Guthrie's "I Ain't Got No Home" was featured on "Pete Remembers Woody," a collection of Pete Seeger's spoken stories about Woody Guthrie. ... more

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Track Name: This Town This Time
With a colt 45 and death in my eyes
I’m taking back what’s mine
across these faded streets, through the haze of the summer heat
they’re gonna know I mean business this time
when you see me coming, you know you’d better run
because I’m firing long before I see the whites of your eyes
and I’ll never regret and you’ll never forget
the day I finally said goodbye

I’m leaving this town this time
And you won’t see me around this time anymore
I’m leaving this town this time
And you won’t see me at the corner bar or the grocery store

What’s a nice guy like me doing in a dump like this
I’ve been asking myself for so long now
I’ve got an ex- girlfriend everywhere I turn
I’ve got to wear a disguise to get around
the few faces I’ve seen that I want to see again
are all gone, gone, gone
I don’t know where they are or if they’ll ever come back
I’m not waiting around, I’m gonna find them

I’m leaving this town this time
And you won’t see me around this time anymore
I’m leaving this town this time
And you won’t see me at the corner bar or the grocery store

Like ten clowns packed in a Volkswagen
For so long I couldn’t find the door
Eighteen hands were blocking my way
But I’m not gonna sweat in here anymore
Track Name: Take My Heart
I woke up with my head against your chest today
I didn’t do anything stupid last night so now we can enjoy the day
You take my hand, you’re holding more than flesh and blood
Through the air around these bones the feelings fly like Noah’s flood
There’s something in your eyes that makes me trust enough to speak
But I must admit your presence makes my knees weak
Take it easy, but take it
My heart is in your hands,please don’t break it
Take my heart, take my heart
Take my heart, take my heart

You woke up something in me that had laid asleep so long
A stirring in my veins like the first chords of a new song
I’m ready now to listen, I’m ready to come clean
There’s something in your eyes that makes me trust enough to speak
Take it easy, but take it
My heart is in your hands, please don’t break it
Take my heart, take my heart
Take my heart, take my heart

You never know what you’ll find when you stop looking
There’s a path to walk and you might be afraid
Love is strong, but in order to go on
You’re gonna need some hope.
Track Name: Free!
I feel giddy as a school boy in the spring
Whenever you walk by I can hear a million bells ring
My head feels like an orchestra
I can’t believe you can’t hear that sound

How could I have been asleep for so long?
Twenty-odd years I’ve been gone, gone, gone
Now I’m watching the road and trying to hear the radio
over my own voice, the din is deafening
but I don’t care if I go deaf because I’m free

Please take my hand, I’m yours to lead
Lead me down a dark alley, I’ll feel my way if I can’t see
I’ve been hiding in the dark and you are the light brightly shining

How could I have been asleep for so long?
Twenty-odd years I’ve been gone, gone, gone
Now I’m listening to the road,
staring at the station numbers
the dashboard light is blinding
But I don’t care if I go blind because I’m free

If this is a dream then let it come to its conclusion
don’t even wake me if they start the revolution
And if I starve before I wake
Don’t worry, give my bones a shake
If I was mad I must be sane
If I was sane I must be crazy

A cop pulled me over-he said I was going too damn fast
So I kissed him softly and he locked me up and threw away the key
Now everyone in this jailhouse is singing

Instead of playing cards and staring at the walls
We stay up all night and raise our voices through the halls
We’re singing along
Trying not to bust up laughing
Even the warden seems to have perfect pitch
I don’t care if they take me down to death row to execute me
I’m Free, we’re free
Track Name: Fallen Angel
We can’t change who we are but sometimes we can play convincing roles
we think we run things here but this life is not ours to control
if I didn’t make things clear, there was one thing that I knew
I could never forgive myself fo ever hurting you

The devil is just a fallen angel and I am just a man
I wish I could change circumstances but I’ve done the best I can

I didn’t know I was contagious untill I saw you getting sick, and I knew I had to run
so if I’m going then I think it’s time for me to start
A better time will never come
and if I don’t look back, it’s not because I didn’t love you
It’s just that I’ll be paralyzed if I don’t find a way to stop thinking of you

The devil is just a fallen angel and I am just a man
I wish I could change circumstances but I’ve done the best I can

Fallen angel, fallen angel
now I understand your fate
looking on at something so beautiful
that you can’t touch, no matter how long you wait

now I’m out here on my own and everything I own is all that’s in my heart
I try to see the meaning of each moment
but it’s not easy when you know what could’ve been
Track Name: Salutations California Style
Hell hound’s on my trail again, I can almost feel its breath
If I don’t get away from here this town could be my death
So I’m packing up my bowling ball, my dog and my guitar
I’m gonna put some mileage on this car

Maybe I’ll go to California, ‘cause there I hear the rain hardly falls
The women grow up strong and greet you with a smile
Its salutations California style

I’m picking up some Junior Mints and a couple packs of gum
I’m looking forward to hearing you say “hey man, we’re mighty glad you’ve come
And as for this old, run-down place and these people who claim to be friends
I hope I never pass this way again

Maybe I’ll go to California, ‘cause there I hear the rain hardly falls
The women grow up strong and greet you with a smile
Its salutations California style

I long to see the dessert, I want to ride the waves
I’m gonna walk those golden canyons from that picture that you gave me
Scrapbooks full of memories, throw them on the fire
I’m gonna wear some rubber off these tires

Maybe I’ll go to California, ‘cause there I hear the rain hardly falls
The women grow up strong and greet you with a smile
Its salutations California style
Track Name: From The Lobby Of A Cheap Motel
My calling card died three days ago and
I’ve been driving since then without sleep
I’m calling from the lobby of a cheap motel
and I know in the morning I can’t pay the bill
I can’t let the police catch up with me so I’ll be on the lamb without a plan
I miss you. I want to kiss you one more time before I die

I’m glad I couldn’t call ‘cause I’m afraid that he might answer
And who could blame you anyway?
Why should you wait for weeks alone?
So I guess ignorance is bliss as they say
But I’m still out here wondering,
I guess as long as you are happy for a moment it’s ok
I miss you. I want to kiss you one more time before I die

I voted by absentee ballot in the last three elections
I don’t know if my vote even counted because I haven’t got a home
I miss you. I want to kiss you one more time before I die

So now I’m risking the last two bucks I’ve got
To give your number one last shot
I can’t leave any call back number
Because I haven’t got a home
I miss you. I want to kiss you one more time before I die
Track Name: I Ain't Got No Home
http://www.woodyguthrie.org/Lyrics/I_Aint_Got_No_Home.htm
Track Name: Dogfood
Those lights look more like dragon fires than stars
The bubbling magma veins are only cars
Lining up like ants they march but find no sustenance
In the harsh, fluorescent, neon, concrete dessert

When it rains the water sits in stagnant pools
Breeding insects to infect us fools
We traded in our freedom for a tiny, shiny box
Racing on a raging slab to nowhere

Skidding all the way to the dogfood factory
You can grind my bones but my soul will still be free

You can run untill your souls fall from your feet
You can burn rubber up this street
You can have the longest stride of any in this place
But you’ll never win in this fixed race

Skidding all the way to the dogfood factory
You can grind my bones but my soul will still be free

Young people are risking their lives tonight
For a moment of feeling strong and beautiful and bright
Some will survive and some will die
Track Name: Obliterate
Memories like weeds are choking my eyes
you’d think I was eighty years the way they leave me blind
if I don’t find a way to get away for a couple of hours
they may end up strangling these few, ragged flowers
temptation is the only thing that seems
to take these ghosts out of my dreams
but if I succumb I wind up worse than before
I need a clean slate, I need a tape I can erase
I need something to obliterate my thoughts and dreams
I wish I was dumb sometimes, but I’m not
so I’ll have to get numb

I’ve painted my history in blood and now I’ll no longer cry
sometimes I wish I had a switch to turn off my mind’s eye
you come along in Technicolor with my salvation in your hand
I lay my head on your breast, too tired to make a stand
I need a clean slate, I need a tape I can erase
I need something to obliterate my thoughts and dreams
I wish I was dumb sometimes, but I’m not
so I’ll have to get numb

beautiful nurse please do something to ease my pain
I don’t care about tomorrow morning, it’s still far far away
take off your white hat and let down your hair
like Rapunzel,let me climb you because I can’t find the stair
we can sigh together ‘till the morning comes

How many times can you watch one scene
rewind and rewind and rewind again
turn the channel, I need to laugh untill I’m sore

I need a clean slate, I need to obliterate
My incriminating history
I need some mystery instead of misery
Something to make me forget
Make me forget, make me forget
Track Name: Fred Gillen Jr. - Conversation On A Train
I met her on a train, she was sitting, looking at the rain
I asked her if I could join her party
she said she was alone and that she was going home
or at least she was looking to try and find one
We talked about our plans, our total lack of plans
and the places we’d seen on our journeys
I said I was alone and my destination was unknown
I asked her if she’d care to join me

Do I remind you of your youth?
Do I remind you that the truth isn’t lurking very far away from a conversation on a train?

When the train had stopped and we’d gotten off
we saw the lights in the distance of a carvinal
and she said “oh, if that could be my life, the rides and smells and smiles every night,
then my life would truly be a miracle.”

Do I remind you of your youth?
Do I remind you that the truth isn’t lurking very far away from a conversation on a train?

I said “why don’t you take a little ride with me,
we could jump off this train somewhere and finally be free.”
The sun in the sky and you and I
we’ll fly into the sunset like a Hollywood movie

Do I remind you of your youth?
Do I remind you that the truth isn’t lurking very far away from a conversation on a train?